Aren't you a pert little thing?

The title of this post is my new pick up line. One of my lady-wise friends advises me that, though not perfect, it's better than 'Dear Customer', followed by a frank appearance appraisal. Hey, say what you like about the ol' Dear Customer strategy, it gets them bug-eyed with fear. Which is something. A friend of mine likes to knock the females back with 'I'm not paying you to talk', which has a Wall Street slash-and-burn ruthlessness about it I quite like. He won't let me borrow it, because I've already borrowed and failed to return his favourite VHS, 'The Rape of Richard Beck'. No more borrowing privileges. A real ball breaker.